Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Today at school was cold! and almost late but lucky never.. Monday during PE lesson, play volleyball.. Play until my hand near the wrist there swollen and pain like fvck! At the end went all the way down to Serangoon to see Chinese doctor.. When the doctor help me rub the pain area, I cried out and say "ah,ah,ah, 痛".. My mother was worried and keep wanting me to get MC or stay overnight at Serangoon then the next morning go home change to uniform but I don't want... I wanted to text him but I guess he won't care a single bits at all? If he care I will sure cried and saying all those things that I shouldn't have say then he and I will never ever be friends or even couple already!!! So I plan not to tell or even texting him.. Texting him might distracted him, I guess? This few days at school lots of things happen.. Siew Ping and Darrien become couple and all the piglets (except: Pei Ni, Meng Zhu, Eileen, Ting Ting, Raymond and Cui Lin-I guess) don't like the two of them together because we know that if once they break up (touch wood) piglets family sure will become 五分裂组?(sorry if it's wrong) And we don't want this to happen but they two together was like "hell" to we! Once they two together, we are like invisible to the two of them! And we don't like or starting to hate how the two they are like now! School work don't need to say getting more and more difficult and stress! If I knew NYAA was a trouble to piglets.. I would have quit earlier! Now almost every single things is start with Darrien! He's the one who once like Yan Ni and now he's with Siew Ping!
我累了！I feel like giving up my studies at this point of time! I don't know why I just not into this course at all! I feel like quitting school for awhile then rest for awhile.. After enough of resting and thinking then I think I'm sure what I want to do already?.. This 10 days, I don't really know what to blog.. I have been going school as per normal.. But breaking up for 2weeks going to be 3weeks soon.. I still couldn't stop missing him and loving him.. Even I send him email two times also no use.. I find that after breaking up with him, wasn't good at all.. whenever I go out alone or with friends there's sure be couple around me! I just feel envy and thinking of him and wishing he was right beside me.. I guess it won't happen at all.. WISHING, THINKING and DREAMING to patch back with him is impossible, I guess? I just couldn't get into another relationship anymore.. If he could then I guess I will just stay my single life forever?..
♥130411, you took my breathe away when our lips touches each other
3:04 AM
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Today morning once wake up, I faster bath and prepare to go school.. Reached school at about 8am sharp?.. At about 8am+ I text him and wishes him all the best and good luck for his test.. When he reply I was feeling happy but I don't dare reply immediately so I waited for 10mins later reply then at the end my phone lag till it send about 10+ text which is still the same text! I was so embarrassed at that time and faster say sorry to him! Oh My God! Why on earth would my phone lag at that time! After that he didn't reply when I send back smiley face.. I was hoping to text him back again but seriously I really really scared he will feel irritated and hate me?.. :x Sorry, I really really can't stop loving you and knowing how you have been. Ever since we broke up, I told myself to wait for you but don't let you know. But I think you already know I would be like this bah?.. I will wait till that day when we could be back together. I'm sorry for thinking and hoping so much for all this to happen.. Please don't leave me even after we broke up..
Yesterday was quite angry with those who are late because I already message them and said meet 1.20pm SHARP at Lot1! After that we all went to woodlands waited for others to come then they was all going in a separate way! I was trying so hard to bring my two groups of friends together but they are all stubborn to get along. I know my ITE friends don't really like my that group of friends but they still give face and try to get along?.. When we reaches Marine Parade, all of us go NTUC buy some BBQ foods and drinks but all go separate way again! Buy finish everything I went to draw money out to return Pei Ru money.. While waiting I heard my ITE friends's conversation.. I turn and stare at them.. I was trying cool myself down because this two groups of friends really really can't get along.. When we was walking to the bicycle renter there they all still walk dam slow! I was angry at that moment and I shouted at them! When we all reached the BBQ pit there, mummy and others are busy on their own.. My cousins, aunt, uncle and my mother's friends all was like doing their things and didn't really NOTICE I at there! I was trying so hard to call all of them but not all bothers to even come say "hi" to me! After that I take food and drinks everything to give my two groups of friends to eat and drink.. I was screaming at them to eat and drinks.. After that, Darrien wanted to talk to me.. He told me that when Cui Lin wasn't purposely almost hit Jiayi, then she shouted "Chee Bye!" at Cui Lin so I promise him that I will called Jiayi to apologies to Cui Lin in front of them.. So I did.. Jiayi wasn't happy with it, I know. Because she tell Lian Heng.. But I have nothing to said anymore.. So about 5pm we all start to cycle to Changi runway.. But all my ITE friends were cycle slow or my that group of friends cycle too fast! haiz! after that we cycle back to the pit and start to eat and drink then we faster rush to return bicycle.. When I cycle there are quite a few people make me wanted to say out bad words! Those people are dam fucking CB lo! I already ring the bicycle bell and they still cut in my way and I almost fall for 3times! At that time I was really hoping he was there.. All the way when I was cycling, I keep on thinking and hoping he will come.. But he didn't.. If he's there I really hope I could hug him tight and say how much I miss him. Mummy they all leave ECP at about 8pm+ then left a lot of stuff behind for me to clean up! I bring a big box of stuff back! At about 9pm+ then cab home! Reached home is about 10pm+! All days I was thinking should I text him but if I text what should I text? I'm scared that he might feel irritated.. So at the end I didn't..
I never stop loving you until the day I die. Sorry.
♥130411, you took my breathe away when our lips touches each other
6:54 AM
yesterday and today lots of thing happen.. yesterday, while all of us walking around class to see the video our friends have make then suddenly Eileen bang until Darrien ah gong's guitar. we all was so shocked and tell her not to tell Darrien ah gong about it first. when we went to Matrix for break-time to eat. all of us went to order food then when we go back to our seat Cui Lin great grandma and Pei Ni jie say that Darrien ah gong check his guitar and was shocked that his new guitar have broke into 2 and his face was totally black. after that Eileen go tell him that she accidentally broke the guitar when me, Hua Ying and Yan Ni mama came back from buying drinks. after that we all was trying to talk to Darrien ah gong and making him at least smile. lucky at the end he did smile but behind the smile, i could see that he still have that sad and pain that his guitar became like this.. At night time around 11.32pm, baby message me and asked me that "Is it ok if he say he wanna be single?" when he say this words my heart start to sink very very deep down and i could feel my eye are watery and I'm shivering.. I was trying my best to tell myself not to cry but i really can't hold back. At that time I though it was just a dream but it was real! I reply and telling him that "I will just leave him alone and have his single life" but I also begging him not to break up with me.. I was crying so hard and about 4am plus i wake up again to reply him and went back to bed to rest.
Today morning once I reach class outside I just don't know how to face my friends because I'm trying my best to hold my tears until all my piglets friends reached and one of them come in front of me and asked what happen. I just cry in front of them and they asked what happen?.. I didn't say a single words but a few of them somehow guess that it might be r/s problem.. Then I just keep on crying and crying till lesson started after that about 9am plus teacher dismiss us to go have our break. At first when we all walk to Matrix, I don't really feel like eating but I can't just keep on don't eat. I was like stuffing food into my mouth when I already feel full. During the second lesson, I going to start cry again but I try to hold back. Last lesson, I was like half died because I really don't have the mood to laugh as my friends trying to say something funny and make me laugh, I just laugh awhile and goes back to the died face. After last lesson, I accompany Siew Ping to attend the selected winners for 'Azimuth' NDP watch design competition 24 finalist. When the knowing of who winning ends, my school people went to take a group photo with Minister Teo.. I was standing beside him for awhile then stand in front of him. We all went to the refreshment area to see all the design and after that Ting Ting, Newton, Jolin asked me and Siew Ping want go town walk walk or slack awhile then go home? We was like laughing but when I was walking I keep on thinking of baby.. I wanted to message him but I suddenly thoughts of what should I message him? And will he reply back? Baby say "he can't bear to.. he's sorry.. he just love me too much" he did say "on one hand he really don't wanna lose me but on the other.. he really don't know what to do.. he's just so lost." I wanted to say something that "he still have me supporting him remember? And I'm hoping to lead him though the lost way." But I afraid that he would just reject what I'm trying to say or what I want to say. Baby I really really love you, I couldn't let myself letting you go. I'm sorry.
♥130411, you took my breathe away when our lips touches each other
8:36 AM
Boyfriend <3!!